Lesbian Pulp Fiction

Squatty Potty - The Toilet Stool

Squatty Potty - The Toilet Stool

Having problems pooping? Always constipated? 

Then perhaps you should try Squatty Potty, the new way to poop. Turns out that sitting down on the loo is not the natural way and that in fact we should all be squatting instead. Which makes sense when you stop to think about it, all though try not to think about it to graphically.

Squatting allows everything to be at the correct angle where as sitting puts a kink in the tube which means we have to apply some force. This can cause all kinds of health issues for us, issues which the makers of Squatty Potty claim their product can eliminate.

Some advice from me is that you can't make a home made one of these using shoe boxes, they will collapse.

"Assuming the squat position is the natural way to achieve easier and more complete elimination."

"It is Squatty Potty’s goal to change the way we poop, one “stool” at a time."

"Start Squatting for only $29.95"

http://squattypotty.com/ 

Football Fashion Faux Pas - Pablo Aurrecochea

Pablo Aurrecochea is a goalkeeper from Uruguay currently playing for Paraguayan team Guarani. He's rather fond of wearing extravagant football kits. Here are just a few examples of his fine work.

Goliath by Tom Gauld.

Goliath is the latest book from Tom Gauld and presents us with the tale of David and Goliath told from the point of view of the giant Philistine.

The big twist here is that Goliath is a peaceful man far removed from the brutish warrior depicted in the biblical story. Gauld presents us with a protagonists who doesn't like fighting and "manly does admin". He swaps his patrol duties for more administrate tasks and sits happily at his table working away in peace.

Until that is someone comes up with a plan to end the war that requires Goliath to issue a daily challenge to the enemy. That's despite him being the "5th worst swordsmen in his platoon". Of course this doesn't matter because he's a giant and can beat anyone, besides who would fight a giant in the first place?

A suit of armour is made for him and a young shield bearer serves him. The lack of his own armour again points to his less than war like ways. Despite his reluctance he understands that this plan could save a lot of lives and end the fighting and so he sets about fulfilling his duties.

Tom Gauld's artwork is deceptively simple, almost child like, but is always brilliant. Whats more it's very well suited to telling us an old historical tale. It reminded me a lot of the Bayeux Tapestry and just seems to really fit the story.

There are some wonderful touches as well such as Goliath not always fitting instide the frame of the picture. And Gauld is not afraid to leave text out and let the art do the story telling. Some nice, and funny, dialogue goes own between the giant and the boy which help to make the reader feel a great deal of sympathy for Goliath.


Of course we all know how the biblical tale pans out and as you near the end of the book you start to worry if the fate of Gauld's Goliath will be the same. Indeed we even have Goliath absent-mindedly playing with a pebble at the start of the book. By the time a rather brash David turns up you are very much against him.

This book presents us with some interesting ideas. Goliath is a peaceful man who doesn't won't to fight yet does his duty. People judge him and form expectations based on his appearance rather than on who he actually is. The roles of hero and villain have been reversed and perhaps gives us some insight into how these labels might not be so easy to define. We can see that the nature of conflict is not always as simple as it's brutality might have us believe.

Goliath is a wonderful comic book, one of my picks of the year, a good example of what the medium can do and I highly recommend it.

How to ruin the childhood memories of a male aged over 30

Album of the Week - Dave Betton

Dave Betton - At Your Request (Denman DD106)

That's a pretty snazzy suit Dave has on I'm sure you would agree and the collar on the shirt would make Harry Hill jealous. Still I'm sure at the time it was very fashionable so lets over look that. The flowers are very pretty although I'm not sure they make for a very interesting background. But what really struck me about this album cover as is just why on earth he's standing in the flower bed and not on the path? Strange bit of composition that.

At your request starts off with Once in a Lifetime - Tonight, a song that sounds like the theme tune to a 1970's quiz show. The Al Jolson medley of songs will of course sit a little uneasy with a modern listener although it's a pretty good impression none the less. The rest of the album varies in style from country to jazz to crooner ballads.

It would be easy for us trendy hipster types to dismiss Dave Betton as nothing more than a club singer, the type you might find in Butlins. His style is very much that of a cabaret performer or entertainer. But to give him his due Dave does have a good voice. On some songs you get hit with a sudden blast of power or notice a note being held longer than one might expect. Clearly the guy can sing even if the songs do all have that same club singer style in the background. His voice is also rather versatile, there's a pretty good impression of Johnny Cash up on his facebook page (25 likes).

Yes that's right Dave is still going strong today and is available for bookings via Hawthorn Entertainment. And as "..an all round entertainer, amazing singer and comedian" has become one of the "..most popular cabaret performers with Thompson Gold Hotels in venues throughout the Mediterranean." Over the years he has played Blackpool many times and earned the nickname "Mr Blackpool".

It doesn't come as a surprise that he's a hit with the cruises and in Blackpool. Seems like something that suits his talents down to the ground. If you like that sort of thing I'd imagine Dave would be hard to beat and I'm sure those who see him have a good night.

"Dave’s act is a potpourri of all that is best in cabaret entertainment and on or off stage he is the ultimate professional." Things do seem to get a bit Alan Partridge at times though.

I might add that is a signed copy.

Dave Betton Facebook page

(all albums of the week have been picked form donations to my local Save the Children shop)

Why Harry Redknapp Should Not be England Manager.

Harry Redknapp might be the hot favorite to take the role of England manager but there are some good reasons why this might well turn out to be a bad idea.

The FA is seems insistent that their next employee be English and looking at a list of my compatriots it would be hard not to put Harry at that top of that list. He might only have one trophy to his name but I think only Steve Mcclaren can better that and he already had a go at the job. The others don't really inspire all that much, for whatever reason Englishmen have not really shown as managers in recent times.

Apparently there is now a shortlist of ten names that meet the requirements. Harry, Stuart Pearce and Roy Hodson would seem obvious. Like wise Alan Pardew and Sam Allardyce but after that you really start to struggle to think who else there really is. Not that people in lower leagues are not doing a good job but you can't really see Brian McDermott or Ian Holloway making the list. There's always Hope Powell who has actually take England to a major final but clearly that is never going to happen.

So it's not exactly a stellar list of the biggest names from football, not even from English football. But do we really need a big name or someone dripping with success?

It's far to say that England have tried all kinds of different approaches in the last few years. While some have provided more opportunities than others none have meet with success. Capello was as good as they come, Mcclaren was a friend of the players, Keegan a good motivator and Sven kept the players happy. You name it we've tried it.

What exactly does Harry have to offer? It's fair to say the Spurs are playing some great football at times but they do also come unstuck against better teams. Which might actually make him the perfect man for the job. He has always struck me as something of a wheeler dealer character. The sort of person who brings in players on free transfers or from aboard and gets the best out of them. I don't think he's as naive tactfully as he can come across but he does tend to come up short against bigger footballing brains. He deserves his place on the shortlist and it's hard to look beyond him but it strikes me that the skills that make him a good club manager are not ones that would work at the national level.

Perhaps my biggest concern with Harry is that he's not all that big on bringing through younger players and would I suspect prefer to stick to the old guard who have failed in the past. He did bring through some young players at West Ham, but that's kind of the law at the club. At Spurs Kyle Walker is getting a chance but is the only under 21 player in the squad. And during the last transfer window in brought in two players aged over 30. There is not really much chance of a good young player getting into the team at Spurs. Not to mention the talk of him bringing Scholes back into the team.

It worries me because I'd much prefer to see us fade out the old players and give the younger ones a chance to play. I don't really see Harry doing this at all. We shouldn't look to play like other nations but we can learn lessons from them. I'd present Germany as a prime example of this. They had a very good under 21 team and decided to fade out the older players. Look at what happened, they are now one of the best teams in the world. Joachim Low was not exactly a top class coach but he had a vision and a plan. The talented young players where given a chance and responded. I'd like to see England do this. All I am saying is give kids a chance.

The top teams are prepared to spend money and give chances to the likes of Jones, Henderson and Chamberlain. So why not give the chance at national level? Of course they are not as good as the players they would replace yet but if you never give them the chance they never will be. Take all the kids to the Euros, let them get a feel for it. Defoe and Crouch might well do a good job but I'd rather Welbeck and Strurridge played. They might well fail but do we expect anything else currently? Let the exuberance of youth have some fun and learn for the world cup.

Admittedly I have no idea who could do this, perhaps Pearce as he has worked with them all before. Hopefully at the interviews someone might actually have a vision and a plan of how to develop things and build for the future. Harry might give a short term boost but he's not really one for forging a grand plan. Harry would be a very short sighted appointment.